The aptly named Mega-Con is going on right now in Orlando, Florida.
This is one of these conventions where fifty or so celebrities — mostly has-beens or never-was’s — sign autographs and take pictures with fans for a fee.
It used to be that big stars didn’t go to these events. For some reason, actual A listers like Jude Law, Ron Howard, Bryce Dallas Howard are all down there this time. Yikes. They must have enough money!
But this time there’s also Hollywood pariah Mel Gibson, charging $259 for a photo and $299 for a “premium experience.” The latter may be where he calls you “Sugar Tits” and reminds the fans of all his antisemitic comments. Maybe he teaches his Holocaust denial.
Gibson — named Ambassador to Hollywood by Donald Trump– charges even more — $356 — for a picture with actor Danny Glover, his co-star in the “Lethal Weapon” movies. Let’s hope it’s a 50/50 split, but you never know. Very sad.
Priscilla Presley, cut off from Elvis’s estate by granddaughter Riley Keogh, gets $106 per shot. She and Mel posed for a picture with Danny Glover I found on Instagram. Now, that’s a collector’s item!
It’s not only old timers doing the Mega Con. “The Juror” star Nicholas Hoult and “Stranger Things” newcomer Joseph Quinn are wearing their cash belts, too. Hoult charges $106 for a photo, and $186 for picture with the guy who played Lex Luthor on TV. Quinn’s price is $117.15 by himself, and $218.33 with Jamie Bower, who plays Vecna on “Stranger Things.”
How about Jude Law? $170.40 for a picture, and $400 bloody dollars with the cast of “Star Wars: Skeleton Crew.”
Saddest story: pictures with the cast of “The Breakfast Club.” Judd Nelson submitted a picture that makes him look like a lost mountain man. You can have your shot with him for just $85.20. With Ally Sheedy, Molly Ringwald, and Anthony Michael Hall for $323.84.
As for Ron and Bryce Dallas Howard, I’m a little disappointed they’re involved in this mishegos. But they may be doing it for “Happy Days” stars Donnie Most and Anson Williams, and for Ron’s brother, cult movie star Clint Howard.
But Andy Serkis, who has to very rich from “Lord of the Rings”: does he really need $117.15 for photos? Same for Hank Azaria, from “The Simpsons.”
What a group? That’s not counting about a dozen or so “celebrities” no one has ever heard of.
Weren’t Flipper or Lassie available? What about Kato Kaelin? Or Luigi, who assassinated the United Healthcare exec? Certainly he must have been available? Indeed, a better Mega Con would be paroled or exonerated criminals, people like Luigi or Amanda Knox. I’d definitely pony up for that convention!
