Justin Bieber’s fifteen minutes of fame are coming to an end.

In a move of utter desperation, Bieber’s management– according to several entertainment sites–supposedly created a hoax this week to promote his new video. Bieber tweeted that his computer and camera had been stolen. Next, a lewd, nude picture of purportedly him turned up on TMZ. Then a new official video came out, and it turned out that the picture wasn’t of him, and that the video was the supposed material that had been stolen.

http://www.eonline.com/news/353581/justin-bieber-stolen-laptop-a-hoax-singer-releases-nicki-minaj-music-video-thanks-alleged-thief

The net-net: the song, “Beauty and a Beat,” has not caused much of a stir on iTunes, where downloads put it at around number 50. On YouTube, there have been over 5 million free viewings for the very expensive looking video, but– and this might be important– only 255,000 times have fans “liked” it. And 22,000 haven’t “liked” it.  “Beauty and a Beat,” disposable pop featuring Nicki Minaj (who has to be paid), is clearly a loss leader for the tour.

Bieber’s album, “Believe,” has not been much of a hit. Another single, “As Long as You Love Me,” has been a very modest hit.

And the tour: Bieber has started his tour with Carly Rae Jepsen in Canada, his birthplace. There, the ticket sales look ok. But in the US, it’s a different story. The secondary ticket market is flooded. Hundreds and thousands of tickets are available on Stubhub.com depending on the sizes of the venues. At Madison Square Garden, it’s a buyer’s market, that’s for sure.

And that’s interesting for everyone because a recent report out of Nashville suggest that Bieber’s management is scalping its own seats to make more money.

http://www.newschannel5.com/story/19616981/documents-show-bieber-is-scalping-his-own-tickets

Phil Williams, reporting out of Newschannel 5 in Nashville, uncovered a cache of documents that show how Bieber’s team is allegedly ripping off fans. According to Williams, Bieber’s management hasn’t responded to the accusations. It’s a must-read story, however, and explains why there are so many tickets on Stubhub. Of course, the irony will be that the marked up tickets don’t sell. The Bieber team could go to the cleaners.

Scooter Braun, Bieber’s manager, has been incredibly clever meantime about diversifying. He clearly has “45 rpm” ears. He picked up Carly Rae Jepsen’s single, “Call Me Maybe,” and turned it into the event of the summer. The album isn’t really selling, and she’s likely done. But Braun likely made a tidy sum from the single. By next year at this time he’ll be saying “Call me, maybe” to Jepsen.

Braun also picked up a novelty single from Korea, called “Gangnam Style.” It’s in the top 3 this week. It’s the “Mambo No. 5” of 2012. No Bieber single has ever sold like “Call Me Maybe” or “Gangnam.” By the time Braun is done, he’ll be living in several mansions. The artists will be trivia questions. It’s the long tradition of the music business.

But with the allegations of scalping, the hoax with the nude picture and the stolen computer stuff, Braun–and his partners, which include Usher– have no doubt seen the darkness at the end of the tunnel. If I were Justin Bieber, and I owned that $100,000 silver car he drives around, I’d be selling it and putting the money into treasury notes right now. That is, if he actually owns it. Or anything.

Imagine that when the Rolling Stones first hit it big in 1964, two years into their career, they were considered avant garde. They were the messed up, smudged answer to the Beatles’ pop perfection. The Stones brought American blues and soul back to these shores, reinterpeted. They were considered a sexual threat. They took on politics, social issues, flouted basic tenets. They were naughy boys and people loved them for it.

Now the Stones have released a fun but challenging single, more interesting than anything on iTunes or radio now. And in 48 hours it has barely made a dent in sales. It’s still hovering between number 70 and 75. The Stones were never huge chart toppers. But they had number 1s starting with “(I Can’t Get No) Satisfaction” through “Brown Sugar,” “Wild Horses,” and “Tumbling Dice.” They had two big singles in 1981– “Start Me Up” and “Waiting on a Friend.” That was 31 years ago.

There have been some minor hits from the post- “Tattoo You” albums like “Rock and a Hard Place” and their excellent cover of “Harlem Shuffle.” The new one, “Doom and Gloom,” comes after six stagnant years. The lyrics are pithy and the music rocks. There’s a great chorus. But it doesn’t fit on radio, as no rock station will play new music by old acts. And for the iTunes generation addicted to bubblegum pop, but the words “fracking,” “sump,” and “horde” may be too much for today’s dimwitted buyers.

Also, the sound of “Doom and Gloom” is not the amped-up reverb-soaked homogenized dreck that passes as pop linooleum. Don Was and the boys have scratched up all the polished wood for an authentic feel. The video is in our player  on the home page. The lyrics follow. Why didn’t they call this song “Baby Won’t You Dance With Me?”

I had a dream last night that I was piloting a plane
And all the passengers were drunk and insane
I crash landed in a Louisiana swamp
Shot up a horde of zombies
But I come out on top
What’s it all about?
Guess it just reflects my mood
Sitting in the dirt
Feeling kind of hurt
All I hear is doom and gloom
And all is darkness in my room
Through the light, your face I see
Baby take a chance
Baby won’t you dance with meLost all that treasure in an overseas war
It just goes to show you don’t get what you paid for
Bowing to the rich and worrying about the poor
Put my feet up on the couch and lock all the doors
Hear a funky noise
That’s the tightening of the screws
Feeling kind of hurt
Sitting in the dirt
All I hear is doom and gloom
But when those drums go boom boom boom
Through the night, your face I see
Baby take a chance
Baby won’t you dance with me
Yeah!
Baby won’t you dance with me
Ah yeah

ALL EXCLUSIVE Lots of this and that from the backstage at Barbra Streisand’s return to Brooklyn: first of all, actor Elliott Gould had no idea his son with Barbra, 46 (yes, hard to believe) year old Jason Gould could sing, would sing, did sing on stage and so professionally with Barbra at the show. Elliott looked a little stunned. During the show, Barbra presents a birthday video that Jason made for her 70th with him singing “Nature Boy” backed by an orchestra. He sounds like a pro, with a deep lustrous version of his mom’s vocals.

After the video, he joined Barbra on stage, where they sang together, then he performed “This Masquerade” on his own. He could easily have a career, and an act. Backstage he told me he’s got songs on iTunes. Indeed he has five songs including “Nature Boy” and “How Deep the Ocean.” A surprised Elliott told me: “I didn’t know he could sing like that. But once when he was younger he sang when we were on a trip, and I knew he had it in him.” A proud father, I’d say…

…A big group gathered in a circle and sang “Happy Birthday” to Chris Botti at the backstage party. The youthful looking horn player turned 50 at midnight. Among the group was his manager, Bobby Colomby, an original member of the great Blood, Sweat, & Tears–who are still not in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, dammit. Now Chris– who tours constantly–is with Barbra at every show–just wowing the crowd musically and doing double time as an able co-host…Good for him…ex girlfriend Katie Couric stopped by to say hello. She missed the show because of an event with one of her kids, but wanted to see Chris and congratulate him…

…The after-party was hosted, nominally, by Universal Pictures chief Ron Meyer– as a friend, not professionally. He brought his 18 year old daughter and two of her college friends. Meyer is the mensch of the movie business. And he’s about to have a huge, huge hit with Tom Hooper’s “Les Miserables” starring Hugh Jackman, Russell Crowe, and Anne Hathaway. Meyers’ guests included former Paramount chief Sherry Lansing and director husband William Friedkin. Also there, the great “Rocky” producer Irwin Winkler…

…Barbra’s manager of half a century Marty Ehrlichmann had a little gathering of his own immediately after the show, and before Barbra was ready to see everyone. She had joked on stage that Marty “spotted me in the neonatal unit at Brooklyn Hospital and knew that I had a voice.” Cantankerous Marty has steered Streisand through mostly ups and presumably downs (I don’t know of any). They’ve had a remarkably successful association. And he’s as feisty as ever, a great guy in a bad business…

…Finally: Barbra’s producer Jay Landers says if “Release Me,” her new album of unreleased tracks is a hit, they have more. And “Release Me” will enter the charts around number 5 on Monday. Not bad.