Call it Fifty Shades of Disaster.

The sequel to “Fifty Shades of Gray,” called “Fifty Shades Darker,” is a critical bust. So far only 9% of critics on Roten Tomatoes have had anything good to say about it. The Jamie Dornan-Dakota Johnson tie down has 75 negative reviews and 7 good ones.

At the box office this weekend, “Darker” will be lucky to finish 3rd behind”The LEGO Batman Movie” and “John Wick 2” with Keanu Reeves. Also releasing today David Oyelow and Rosamund Pike in “United Kingdom.” All three of those films have ratings 80 or higher.

At this rate, if there is another “Fifty” movie it will likely go straight to a TV platform or VOD. And who knows if Dornan or Johnson will even do it. The novelty of E.L. James’s crap novel has passed. And with James getting final cut–which I reported last week– no movie director will want to pick up the last handcuff.

Fresh off his stunning off Broadway success in “Othello” with Daniel Craig, the charming and very buff David Oyelowo joked with journalists this week at a press junket for his new film, “A United Kingdom.” The “Selma” actor stars as another real-life historical person in the drama about a mixed-raced couple by Amma Asante, who directed the brilliant “Belle” a few years ago.

“A United Kingdom” is the true love story of King Seretse Khama (Oyelowo) of Botswana, who attends college in London and falls for a middle-class white woman, Ruth Williams (Rosamund Pike) in the late 1940’s just as apartheid was being introduced in South Africa. The romance and subsequent marriage was a big deal and caused an international political crisis on both sides of the divide. Despite efforts by their families and governments to tear them apart, the couple remained steadfast in their devotion and marriage until Seretse’s death and their story, which is little known nowadays, is engrossing and hugely inspiring.

The opening scenes of “A United Kingdom” feature Oyelowo as Seretse in a boxing ring going a few rounds against an unscrupulous rival. Oyelowo is naked to the waist and has an enviable six-pack.

Asked what he did to get in shape for the boxing scenes, Oyelowo noted that Seretse was athletic. “He boxed at university. You don’t want to start a movie with boxing and look like Dr. King, as much as I love Dr. King,” he laughed, adding, “This tends to be the shape I’m in. Most people came to be aware of me as I was playing Dr. King when I was 30 pounds heavier than I normally am, so it’s wonderful,” He laughed, “Now every time people see me they go, ‘You look good!’”

Oyelowo said from the moment he read the book on which the movie is based, “Colour Bar: the Triumph of Seretse Khama and his Nation,” by Susan Williams, he was determined to get a film made. “I couldn’t believe I didn’t know about the story.”

The movie’s themes resonated with Oyelowo on a personal level. “He (Seretse) comes from royalty and so does my father. He’s a Nigerian prince and he’s Yoruba, one of the main tribes in Nigeria and he married my mom, who’s Igbo, and that’s quite taboo, and she’s a commoner, so they eloped to the UK in order to be married and be together. It’s on a much smaller scale” than what transpired with Ruth and Seretse, but Oyelowo noted, “It was probably in the back of my mind as I was reading this story.”

“But as someone who’s in an inter-racial marriage myself,” he added, “when I happened upon this story I found myself feeling huge relief that me – myself and Jessica (Oyelowo) – that I didn’t have to go through what they went through,” he said. “I find it admirable how they stuck to their guns.’’’

Oyelowo’s wife Jessica Oyelowo, has a small but noticeable role in “A United Kingdom” as the snooty wife of a high-ranking British diplomat who does all he can to put roadblocks in the way of the lovers. Was if fun being the film with his wife? I added that his beautiful wife, with whom he has four children, is very good.

“Too good I think playing that racist lady, don’t you think?” he laughed.

As for what’s ahead, Oyelowo is taking a break from substance-oriented historical movies and people suffering, even if he’s not exactly slipping into “Hangover” territory.

“I have an action comedy coming out later this year that Nash Edgerton directed and that’s with Charlize Theron, Joel Edgerton, Thandie Newton, Amanda Seyfried, Sharlto Copley, and trust me,” said Oyelowo, “there’s not a historical speech in sight. It’s me playing a fool and having a lot of fun, and then, yes, the J.J. Abrams ‘Cloverfield’ film [called “God’s Particle”], with no speeches, and no black people are struggling in that film either.”

photo c2017 Showbiz411 by Paula Schwartz

Jack Nicholson– he’s not retired after all.

Turns out Peter Fonda’s off hand comment about Smilin’ Jack has motivated the three time Oscar winner to come out of “retirement” and sign for a new film. Jack will play the title character in “Toni Erdmann,” a US remake of Maren Ade’s Oscar nominated sensation. Kristen Wiig will play his daughter.

In the Ade version, Peter Simonischek is Toni and Sandra Huller is his put upon daughter. Toni wants to reconnect with his daughter, lost to him through divorce, but she’s a very straight arrow, corporate type who doesn’t enjoy her dad’s wild antics.

There’s no writer or director yet, but Alexander Payne would be perfect. The producing team includes Adam McKay and Will Ferrell, and the studio is Paramount. But this is not a Will Ferrell type movie, quite the opposite. With the right writer and director, an American “Toni Erdmann” could be very affecting.

Nicholson hasn’t made a movie since the not great “How Do You Know?” in 2010. It seemed like he was done, but maybe he wants to go out big time, with an Oscar nom or win. On paper, at least, this could be that project.

If you’re young and really don’t know Jack Nicholson’s work, do what I did recently– watch “Chinatown,” “Carnal Knowledge” and “Five Easy Pieces.” Take a look at “Prizzi’s Honor.” He’s edgy and sexy, there’s no one like him today. If young Jack Nicholson were working in 2017, he’d have all these current guys for lunch.

Welcome back, Jack!