“Tootsie” has arrived on Broadway to great reviews and lots of laughs in the airport terminal like Marriott Marquis Theater last night.

Before the show even started, the fun was on the red carpet where I hung out with Gossip Queen Cindy Adams. Oh, the stories you won’t hear!

But what a gang! Carol Burnett, Debra Messing, Kristen Chenoweth, Harvey Fierstein, Clive Davis, Valerie Simpson, Michele Lee, Sandra Bernhardt, Richard Kind with his 14 year old son, Brenda Vaccaro, Desmond Child, Bobby Cannavale and Rose Byrne, and Ryan Eggold– star of NBC’s “New Amsterdam” — were among the parade of A listers who held the show’s curtain from going up for at least a half hour. That’s the way we like it!

Here’s a little scoop: Eggold tells me he can sing, and he’s considering doing a Broadway musical. It will not be called “Sutures and Slings.” Also interesting: even though “New Amsterdam” had a title change from “Bellevue,” the actual New York hospital it’s based on, they shoot some of the show there.

But back to “Tootsie”: I had the honor sitting in the top row with Shubert Organization president Phil Smith. We could hear the roars of laughter as they rolled up from the orchestra level. The big star of the night was Sarah Stiles, known to TV audiences from the show “Billions.” (A lot of the cast was there to support her.) Stiles plays the Teri Garr role, Sandy, from the 1982 movie, and steals the show right from the second number. The Tony Award category of Best Supporting Actress is going to be very competitive, what with Amber Grey (Hadestown) and Leslie Kritzer (Beetlejuice) also at the top-top-top of their games.

Santino Fontana takes the Dustin Hoffman role as Michael Dorsey/Dorothy Michaels, updated of course, and Lilli Cooper has the Jessica Lange part of Julie. The show has been revamped significantly from the movie, with the soap opera setting exchanged for a Broadway musical about Juliet’s nurse from “Romeo and Juliet.” Reg Rogers is hilarious as Dabney Coleman-inspired producer who’s hot for Julie, Andy Grotelueschen is the best friend played by Bill Murray (and now more Seth Rogen-ish), and Julie Halston is a new character– the rich widow who financially backs the show.

In this plot, updated from 1982, the Charles Durning character (Julie’s dad) is gone, and the word ‘lesbian’ is used a couple of times (not in the movie). It’s Very Modern, which resonates with the 2019 audience. My only complaint about Robert Horn’s book is that there is no scene in which Michael gets the idea to become Dorothy. After many career frustrations as an actor, Michael simply appears as Dorothy without explanation.

Fontana, who’s been in countless Broadway shows, is a star as Michael/Dorothy, very winning and wholly in charge of the stage. But he’s playing it very close to Dustin Hoffman at all times. No one should forget that Dorothy is Hoffman’s invention, from the wigs to the accent. Over the last two years, Hoffman has gotten slagged in the #MeToo movement. But he has been a genius inventing characters, with Dorothy at the top of the list.

What a relief to see a real play. Arthur Miller’s “All My Sons” is back, directed with new insights by Jack O’Brien, and with sensational performances from Annette Bening, Tracey Letts, and Benjamin Walker, not to mention a newcomer named Hampton Fluker, as well as Michael Hayden.

Last night, opening night, the main performers were on fire. I really thought Tracey Letts was going to self-immolate. Annette Bening, too long not on Broadway, will now be welcomed back constantly. Ben Walker really comes into his own in this presentation. And so on.

So I was quite surprised to see Jesse Green (whom I don’t know) from the New York Times give this show a negative review. He is the only main theater critic who didn’t love it. On the other hand, he loved the grossly awful “Gary” with Nathan Lane. It maybe time for a vacation. The Times is not giving its readers accurate criticism.

“All My Sons” could not be more timely or topical, even though it was published in 1947 and refers to World War II. Joe Keller (Letts) has let his partner in a munitions factory go to jail after 21 pilots died from faulty manufacture. In fact, it was Joe who was responsible. Now the son (Fluker) of his imprisoned partner has come to seek revenge, while Joe’s family– purposely ignorant of his guilt– must grapple with his crime.

Sound like Boeing and their new 737? Or Volkswagen? Or Amtrak? Yep. It couldn’t be more relevant. Want to Make America Great Again? Well, Miller took his story from 1946 headlines, when America was supposedly “great.” People have always been flawed, and self deluded in how they rationalize poor behavior. Joe Keller is at the top of the list.

To make things worse, though, the Kellers lost a son, Larry, in the War. He plane was shot down, but his mother, Kate Keller (Bening) would prefer to believe he may come home again. For Miller, this was his 11th play, his first hit, and preceded his masterwork, “Death of a Salesman,” by two years.  In many ways you can see “All My Sons” as a precursor to “Salesman,” a notebook. The play is a little on the nose, but then far superior to anything else of the time.

The first act is the set up (there are three acts). By the second act, we’re moving, pieces of the backstory are peeled back like an onion skin, the audience is learning what the characters know: they should not be in the same room together. After what’s already occurred, they should remain at a great distance. Instead, it’s like their drawn back to a flame to see if it will kill them. It’s almost like Russian Roulette. And the closer they get to their emotional crisis, you want to jump on stage and advise them to leave.

Again, I loved Bryan Cranston in “Network” and Jeff Daniels in “Mockingbird.” So we’ll add Tracey Letts to the Best Actor in a Play category. He is remarkable. Annette Bening may be a slam dunk for Best Actress. All those Oscar nominations, and now finally she’s back. She’s given Kate her first real, understood delivery maybe ever. Bening is so good, and her show is current, that I do think The Tony Committee should give Elaine May a special Tony for “Waverly Gallery.” (And Joel Grey one for directing “Fiddler” in Yiddish.)

What a night! Bryan Cranston was there. So was Bening’s husband, Warren Beatty, front and center and backstage. Many stars showed up including Miller’s daughter Rebecca (writer and director) with her son Ronan Day-Lewis, Celia Weston, Annaleigh Ashford and actor husband Joe Tapper, Ben Platt, Bill Irwin, Bobby Cannavale, and my old friend Warren Leight, who had great news. After four years away he’s going to back be Executive Producer of “Law & Order: SVU.” His five years there were legendary. Now Dick Wolf is going to have him do seasons 21 through 25, at least. Bravo !

Mel Brooks is coming to Broadway. Two nights– June 17th and 18th at the Lunt Fontanne Theater.

Mel is 92 years young. God willing he’ll turn 93 ten days later. Amazing. The brilliant and hilarious legend of everything from “Your Show of Shows” to “Blazing Saddles,” “Young Frankenstein,” and of course, “The Producers” will put on a little show. It will be glorious.

Mel’s shows are part of Live Nation’s “In Residence” series. They’re going to announce the rest of the summer line up soon. Mel Brooks is a good omen!

Ticket sales begin tomorrow, April 23, on ticketmaster.com

I don’t blame Nathan Lane. He’s a comic giant, along with Kristine Nielsen and Julie White. They are the best actors Broadway can summon. But Taylor Mac’s “Gary: A Sequel to Titus Andronicus” is utter crap. They are tortured on stage by a playwright who’s given them some of the worst material I’ve ever seen on a stage, Broadway or otherwise.

Do not trust the NY Times review except for one line: he doesn’t know if “Gary” will last a month. I do. It won’t. The audience fled from the performance I saw. If there had been an intermission for this 90 minute play, no one would have returned.

No one likes “Titus Andronicus.” It’s not a play that needs a sequel of any kind. Of all Shakespeare’s plays, you’d be best off to just leave it alone. But this Taylor Mac won’t do that. He thinks it’s funny that after the big battle at the end of the play, the curtain would rise on a mound of dead warriors (made from puppets) with flapping penises. Enter Nathan Lane as a former clown who is now a maid assigned to clean up the mess. Kristine Nielsen, who I adore, is already there. She’s in charge. For about ten minutes they do some shtick, they’re very funny, and you calm down. This may work out.

Nielsen is teaching Lane, who sports a Harpo Marx horn with a big red ball he can squeeze, how to remove the gas and feces from the dead bodies. That’s funny, very briefly. But then what? What is the point of this play? No one knows or cares about “Titus Andronicus.” And soon the pair are talking about absolutely nothing. Nothing. All the mugging and carrying on will not save them. Not even Julie White, who appears at midpoint, and distracts from the main problem: there is no play.

Nathan Lane has soared on Broadway. In “It’s Only a Play,” I was crying for laughing. Nielsen was a genius in “Vanya and Sonia and Masha and Spike.” Genius. Julie White can do no wrong. I felt for them on the stage at the Walter Kerr. There is just nowhere to go except in the abyss. If only they could remain on that stage and do something else. Anything else. Please. Just talk to the audience. We’d understand.

The author, Taylor Mac, has won a MacArthur Genius Grant, which puts that whole enterprise into question. He’s also won a Doris Duke Award, which I assume is named for the late, completely crazy heiress who used to give birthday parties on her front lawn for her llama. Now that would have made a great scene in “Gary.”

Want to see real play on Broadway? See “The Ferryman.”