Monday, December 22, 2025
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Women on the Verge Musical: The Gazpacho Is Sour

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“Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown” is based on Pedro Almodovar’s great movie.It’s staged by Bartlett Sher, who’s a great director, and written by a bunch of people who’d be better off staying out of it–David Yazbek included.

On the stage curtain before the show begins, there’s a recipe for Gazpacho. Famously from the film, gazpacho laced with valium is a plot device later on.

Almodovar is Spanish, and the movie takes place in Madrid. So it only makes sense that no one who worked on this show is remotely Spanish, Latin, or Hispanic. Instead, we get four big, miscast Broadway stars: Patti Lupone, Brian Stokes Mitchell, Laura Benanti, and Sherie Rene Scott, as well as Mary Beth Peil, Danny Burstein, and Justin Guarini from the first season of “American Idol.” (Remember “Kelly and Justin”?)

They all try valiantly to rescue this piece of sludge, a show that is so mis-organized that it’s almost like an SAT test to try and re-order the scenes to make the show make sense. Unfortunately, even Patti LuPone can’t do it. None of the stars have proper entrances, but then again, there are no set up scenes or anything to define what we’re seeing on stage. Only Laura Benanti breathes any life into her songs or scenes, but that’s because they’re actually written for her.

Imagine that a show can go by 45 minutes before any of these stars really has a scene or a song. Only Sherie Renee Scott is featured up to that point, as well as Burstein as a cab driver. The production has instead spent a massive amount of time and money on an actual taxi cab set on a complex track, as well as a motorcycle, and video backdrops (instead of sets) in case a young audience might be bored by stationary props.

No one involved in this seemed to have rethought the movie for the stage. So Brian Stokes Mitchell’s Ivan, the man all the women are having nervous breakdowns over, is never established. He’s a cipher even after he makes his delayed entrance. LuPone does as much as she can with Lucia, Ivan’s ex and mother of his children. But she’s a cardboard cut out, again, not established. Lucia sort of backs into the show.

I like Sherie Rene Scott, but she’s not Spanish. Sorry. They’ve made her look like Carmen Maura, the great star of the movie. But really, New York is full of Latina actresses. They couldn’t find one to play Pepa? (Karen Olivo, maybe, although she might too young. Pepa proudly announces she’s 42.)

And then there are the songs. Oy! With the exception of Benanti’s “Model Behavior” show stopper, and LuPone’s attempt at one (the director kind of aborts her “Time Stands Still” just as it’s taking off), the songs do nothing for the show or the characters. They are songs without melodies, hooks, or choruses. It’s very frustrating.

Pedro Almodovar writes in Playbill that Madrid in 1987 was a big party, that Spain — enjoying democracy — was hedonistic. On Broadway, Madrid of this musical is quite the opposite. It’s like a long night in a fly over state, where the gazpacho comes out of a can.

But who knows? “The Addams Family” is atrocious, and it’s a hit, still playing. These days, anything can happen.

TV Reality Contestant Julien Hug Found Dead

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Good looking, athletic restaurant owner, from a very good San Diego family--Julien Hug, 35, was found dead yesterday in a hiking area off Route 74 in Riverside, California.

On his blog site he’d written, probably in 2009, the following: “I love to write. Predominantly because I am able to communicate through the written word much better than the spoken word. My page is here to make you laugh. I like knowing that I have made someone smile or inspired them. You will get stories from my life in the restaurant business,adventures, misadventures and rants(skewed towards humor of course). Enjoy!”

His rants included blogs about working out (and not becoming the gym pervert), babies in his restaurant, and driving a Lamborghini really fast.

“The performance of this car sums up only half of the Lamborghini experience. Reaction to this car is priceless. People stare and gawk openly. On my first fill up at the local gas station, a teenager approached. “Hey Dude I know you are someone famous, who are you?” I tried to explain but was not believed.
A smiling police officer said “I could write you a huge ticket just for looking fast
Cruising down through Del Mar the car was a magnet for attention, and the rumble of the Lamborghini setting off car alarms continually enhanced the spectacle. I have to admit I took secret delight in doing this as did I when driving through tunnels and under bridges. Upon seeing an overpass I would downshift to get the rpms higher and floor it through the tunnel. This amplied the deep scream of the engine and always made me smile.”

Hug’s parents own the well known Mille Fleurs restaurant in San Diego. Their son was on his way to work at another one of their restaurants when he disappeared. On his Facebook page, Julien had the nickname “His Lordship” which probably had something to do with managing the restaurant.

Michael Jackson: Deal For New Album Cut Late Last Night

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This “Breaking News”–also the title of the first single from Michael Jackson‘s new album, written and produced by Eddie Cascio.

Sony Music just sent out a cover picture for Michael Jackson‘s album — called “Michael”– set for December 14th.

Yesterday I was told there was no deal brokered yet between all the fractious parties in the Jackson camp. Co executor John McClain was still claiming that the vocals on some of the tracks weren’t Michael’s.

Sony seems to disagree. They’ve made their move.

MORE: The album will include at least four or five of the “Cascio” tracks, produced mostly by Teddy Riley, including the single. Apparently the estate settled all internal political issues, as outlined here first and exclusively (thanks TMZ for mucking around in our area).

The decision was made by all parties finally at 11pm last night.

And so it goes.

More to come, of course…

Here’s full cover by artist Kadir Nelson:

Patricia Clarkson and Stanley Tucci Will Co-Host Gotham Awards

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Patricia Clarkson–we do call her Patty–got Star of the Year today from the Motion Picture Club. She gave her usual funny, gracious acceptance speech.

“Thanks for thinking I’m ‘Star of the Year.” Star of the Hour, maybe. Or Star of This Lunch.”

Clarkson makes a dizzying number of movies, with fine appearances in all of them. But her work in “Cairo Time,” which IFC released this summer, is Oscar worthy for lead actress. I’d say, put her in with front runners like Annette Bening, Nicole Kidman, and Natalie Portman. It’s a crazy tough category this year, with other hopefuls like Michelle Williams, Naomi Watts, Sally Hawkins, and Julianne Moore and Helena Bonham Carter (if these two don’t go into Supporting).

“Cairo Time” got a limited release from IFC. If you’re an Academy voter, you must see this performnance, however. It’s a knockout.

Clarkson and Stanley Tucci will co-host the Gotham Awards for Film Independent here in New York on November 29th.

Meanwhile, Doug Liman, director of “Fair Game,” was also cited at the MPC lunch at the Marriott Marquis. His first cousin, “Little Fockers” director Jon Hamburg, roasted him with memories of their days making little homemade films. “Black Swan” producer Scott Franklin was also honored.

By the way, the Motion Picture Club is for all the theater owners and distributors. They raise lots of money every year for a variety of charities. Last year, they even skipped the lunch and spent the money on charity. Nice stuff!

PS The MPC was Jon Hamburg’s second awards event of the day. In the morning, his mom, the great Joan Hamburg of WOR Radio here in New York, won an award from the Chamber of Commerce. Congrats! Joan is the New Yorker of the Year. And she is!

Bruce Springsteen Personal Guitar: $140,000 at Live Auction

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Bruce Springsteen knows one dirty joke. He told it two years ago at Bob and Lee Woodruff’s tribute to returning soldiers. (The show was live streamed to soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan.) He told it again last night. I can’t repeat it here, but it works.

But mostly Bruce rocked the Beacon Theater last night, with the Max Weinberg Big Band behind him. They did three songs — “Open All Night,” a duet with Mrs. S–Patti Scialfa, and a major, rocking, spectacular “Kitty’s Back” with something like eight horn players and just sheer wildness.

But nothing was wilder than Cristina Carlino, the woman who started Philosophy (soaps, fragrances) bidding a winning $140,000 for the guitar Springsteen used during the show. Even Bruce was a little shocked. “It’s my cheapest guitar,” he said. Carlino says she’s a songwriter, so the guitar will come in handy.

Meantime, the whole “Stand Up for Heroes” event last night was a winner, from host Jon Stewart — very funny, all the time– to Tony Bennett’s knockout rendition of “The Best is Yet To Come.” It was legendary Bennett at his best.

And then there was Jerry Seinfeld. After TV’s Joel McHale did a short riff on his notoriously cheap father, then Bill Blur did an inappropriate and dark segment on why women deserve to be hit. (I’m not kidding.) It was funny, yeah, but in questionable taste.

Thank goodness for Seinfeld. He’s the king, the Pro. His 20 to 25 minute set was sheer genius, mixing some old material with new. Among his subjects: cell phones and what goes on in men’s rooms. It was a set about nothing, and everything.

This is the fourth year that Caroline Hirsch and Andrew Fox, of Caroline’s Comedy Club, have produced the Woodruffs’ show. Stand Up for Heroes, which raised around $3 million last night, back returning veterans, especially those with disabilities. In the audience last night: General George Casey, chief of staff of the Unites States Army; and General Peter Chiarelli, the Vice Chief of Staff, as well as Woodruff pals Brian Williams and Campbell Brown.

Joel McHale: “Snooki is like an Oompa Loompa dipped in toner.”

And thus commences the New York Comedy Festival. http://www.nycomedyfestival.com/

First Guests for “The Marriage Ref”: Regis, Tracy Morgan, Susie Essman

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THE MARRIAGE REF’S FIRST GUESTS…SALLY HAWKINS IS ‘MADE’ FOR OSCAR…BARBARA FAIRCHILD FREE AT LAST…

Jerry Seinfeld‘s “The Marriage Ref” is getting ready as a replacement series on NBC. There shouldn’t be too much trouble finding room for it. NBC is barely registering nighttime viewers at this point.

I’m told the first new show taped has these guests: Regis Philbin, Tracy Morgan, and Susie Essman. You’d think Regis would have a lot to say about marriage–after all, some of his funniest stuff is with his very patient wife, Joy. But a source from the show told me: “Regis was a little timid on the show, actually. He may have been intimidated by Tracy.” No word on Susie’s role in the trio, but she is side splittingly funny…

Sally Hawkins is getting a big push for Best Actress in “Made in Dagenham,” which opens Friday. Earlier this week, Revive and Laura Mercier sponsored a lovely ladies lunch for “Made in Dagenham” stars Sally and Miranda Richardson at Rouge Tomate on East 60th St. Sort of the British take on “Norma Rae,” the film inspired a lot of discussion at lunch about the women’s movement. And director Nigel Cole, more importantly, told me an off the record story about two big name actors he directed in a sex scene — in recent years–who were too into what they were doing. “I had to tell them to stop,” he said. I can’t tell you the actors’ names. Sorry. “Dagnenham” should be a sleeper hit with the Academy. Sally is a doll. This could be her year…

Barbara Fairchild, one of the great people in the media biz, leaves the editorship of Bon Appetit on November 23 after ten years. She was there for 22 years before that. Look, even murderers are pardoned in a shorter time! Barbara’s friends toasted her Monday night at the hot new Lambs Restaurant on West 44th St. (This is going to be ‘the’ place in the theater district very shortly. Sensational!) Once Barbara wraps up her term, she’s got websites cooking and lots of plans. She should be judging a show like “Top Chef” before too long. Congrats, Barbara. Conde Nast’s loss is our gain!

Fiddler on the Roof Creators Die Within Ten Days of Each Other

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Jerry Bock died today. He was the gifted composer, with Sheldon Harnick, of the score of “Fiddler on the Roof.” He was 81, and had had a stroke a few days ago. Here’s a link to the story from Playbill. http://tinyurl.com/2f7bncf

Bock died just ten days after the passing of 98 year old Joseph Stein, who wrote the book for “Fiddler” from the stories of Sholom Aleichem. Now only Harnick, who’s 86, survives from this incredibly talented trio.

“Fiddler” remains a high water mark in Broadway musical history. At one point in the early 70s it was the longest running musical on Broadway. With its poignant and nostalgic story of Jews leaving Russia, and a score–what a score!–that includes so many well known songs–the title song, “If I Were a Rich Man,” “Sunrise Sunset,” “Far from the Home I Love,” “Tradition”–there is nothing else like it.

Mazel tov, and Shalom. Considering what’s coming up this week musical wise on Broadway, these men will be sorely, sorely missed.

Matt Le Blanc On Overcoming Joey from “Friends”

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“People’s guards come down when they think you’re dumb,” Matt LeBlanc told our reporter, Randee Dawn, on Tuesday night at a special Showtime pre-screening of his new series “Episodes” at the Crosby Hotel – in which he plays a guy called … Matt LeBlanc. “People really do come up to me and speak slowly and think I’m Joey.”

Poor guy. It’s been six years since “Friends” went off the air and three since “Joey” failed to thrive, and he’s not sure he’s ever going to stop being seen as lovable – but none-too-bright – Joey Tribbiani in most peoples’ heads. Maybe that’s why he decided to play a version of himself in “Episodes” (the show starts airing in January) – egoistic, greedy and a lot smarter than people give him credit for. It’s like a transition phase.

“You’ll think, oh, this guy is just a prick,” he continued, “but you have to be smart to be that dumb.”

“Episodes” wasn’t the only series getting a first airing for the press: New Showtime entertainment president David Nevins was on hand
to also introduce a screening of “Shameless,” starring William H. Macy. In it, the “Fargo” Oscar nominee takes a turn (and a fall or
two) as a chronic drunk who lets his large family more or less run themselves (thankfully, they have Emmy Rossum in charge). Macy – who
was taking a break from production for the night – showed up in a 10-day beard and long, stringy hair to match his character.

“The beard’s the easy part,” he says. “It’s this hair – I keep wanting to flip it. How the heck do you hold it back?” he asked. “I was a
hippie in college, so I’ve had hair down past my shoulders but I forgot how you keep from getting it into your food.”

Speaking of which, Showtime laid out a seafood and chicken spread for the assembled crowd pre-screening, then offered up desserts afterward
– just as midterm election results began rolling in. Nevins retreated to the jumbo screen in a separate room to keep track of the numbers,
while LeBlanc and Macy entertained the troops in the main room.

“Episodes,” as it turns out, is something of a “Friends” reunion – LeBlanc is re-paired with former executive producer David Crane, who’s
now writing with Jeffrey Klarik. That meant they couldn’t possibly pretend “Friends” never existed, and LeBlanc teased there will be some
spoofing of the series in “Episodes” (though for the moment no additional former “Friends” are slated to appear).

“We just wanted to see if we can twist things around a bit,” he said. “It was fun to take the piss out of myself.”

The series goes into the metamorphosis a hit British show undergoes when it hops the pond and gets “Matt LeBlanc” as its star. Along the
way, Hollywood and TV development gets a royal skewering – as does the moral-free head of the network. LeBlanc says those scenes are truer
than you’d expect.

“I’ve seen some strange things,” he allowed. “I’ll leave it at that –I do still have a career I’m hoping to keep.”

A very smart move.

Quincy Jones Is Back: With Akon, Jamie Foxx, Jennifer Hudson, Usher, Amy Winehouse (See video)

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Quincy Jones is back, man! The big Q!

His “Soul Bossa Nostra” CD is ready for November 12th release.

Guest stars are Jamie Foxx, Jennifer Hudson, Akon, Amy Winehouse and Mark Ronson, and John Legend–among the group.

It’s a party on CD. In fact, Amy Winehouse sings the Lesley Gore classic, “It’s My Party.” Here’s the tracklisting:

Ironside – Talib Kweli produced by Quincy Jones, Ray Brown, & Phil Ramone
Strawberry Letter 23 – Akon produced by Aliaune “Akon” Thiam and Giorgio Tuinfort
Soul Bossa Nostra – Ludacris, Naturally 7, and Rudy Currence produced by Roger Thomas, Kevin Deane and Simuel Stevenson
Give Me The Night – Jamie Foxx produced by David Banner, Warryn Campbell, and Quincy Jones
Tomorrow –  John Legend produced by Wild Animals and Quincy Jones
You Put A Move On My Heart – Jennifer Hudson produced by Scott Storch and Quincy Jones
Get The Funk Out Ma Face – Snoop Dogg produced by Terrace Martin and Quincy Jones
Secret Garden – Usher, Robin Thicke, Tyrese, LL Cool J, Tevin Campbell and Barry White produced by Jermaine Dupri and Quincy Jones
Betcha Wouldn’t Hurt Me –  Mary J Blige featuring Q-Tip and Alfredo Rodriguez produced by Q-Tip and Quincy Jones
Everything Must Change  – Bebe Winans produced by Mervyn Warren
Oluwa (Many Rains Ago) – Wyclef Jean produced by Wyclef Jean and Jerry ‘Wonda’ Duplessis
P.Y.T. T-Pain and Robin Thicke – produced by T-Pain
It’s My Party – Amy Winehouse produced by Mark Ronson
Hikky Burr – Three 6 Mafia and David Banner produced by DJ Paul
Sanford and Son –  T.I. and B.o.B. featuring Prince Charlez and Mohombi produced by RedOne and Quincy Jones

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5jYQrTYTfkA&feature=player_embedded

Spider Man Broadway Flying Problems: We Told You Three Weeks Ago

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http://tinyurl.com/25fgffh

We told you on October 12th that “Spider Man: Turn off the Dark” was expecting investigators to look at all its flying components. See the link above. This was long before the accidents that have happened at the Foxwoods Theater on West 42nd St., and before both the New York Times and today’s story in the Hollywood Reporter.

The investigators were always scheduled to come. But now, with various accidents, they’ll be extra eagle-eyed.

One of the problems may be that the people who are flying around, dressed as Spider Man, etc, aren’t trained acrobats. As I reported before, they’re just athletic actors.

The flying will likely be approved, and the show will go on. I am told that scenes where Spider Man flies around and lands in the audience are “spectacular.” Sources working on the show so far have nothing about excited praise for what’s going on–except, of course, those that have wound up in the ER.