The National Board of Review, er, fans, named Kathryn Bigelow’s “Zero Dark Thirty” Best Picture just now. They follow the New York Film Critics Circle even though the NBR are not reviewers but fans who pay $700 a year membership to watch movies. It took hundreds of thousands of dollars for the NBR to reach the same conclusion as the NYFF– and they did it for nothing.

Today I spoke to several older members who told me they’d recently been forced out of the NBR based on age and perceived disabilities by the group’s leader, Annie Schulhof. One member told me Schulhof said she couldn’t come to screenings on a walker because of “liability from the studios.” I am awaiting comment from Schulhof.

The group made some strange choices, as usual. “Compliance” is a movie only the NBR has seen. To give Ann Dowd Best Supporting Actress, the NBR had to skip over Sally Field, Anne Hathaway, Amy Adams, Jacki Weaver, Jennifer Ehle, at least, to find someone obscure and who will not be nominated for an Oscar.

“Looper” was Best Original Screenplay? What? But everyone gets something because the NBR charges the studios $13,000 per table to attend their gala in January. Plus members pay around $600 a ticket to attend. Hilarious. Everyone gets their picture taken with a star. The big surprise is so many wins for The Weinstein Company. Schulhof, according to my sources, had been keeping them out the last few years. But the prospect of Leonardo DiCaprio and Bradley Cooper at the dinner must have made Schulhof delirious.

Cut out this year: the Warner Bros. crowd, where Schulhof has always had a soft spot, no Clooney or Eastwood as I predicted back in October. Maybe the column I wrote scared them away. But a couple of wins for “Beasts of the Southern Wild,” directed by Benh Zeitlin, a graduate of Wesleyan. NBR board member Janine Basinger, who runs the film department at Wesleyan, is said to have been one of his instructors. She must be very proud.

PS Ann Dowd, who won Best Supporting Actress for “Compliance,” had her Wikipedia updated 18 minutes after the announcement was sent out. Wow.

Best Film: ZERO DARK THIRTY

Best Director: Kathryn Bigelow, ZERO DARK THIRTY

Best Actor: Bradley Cooper, SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK

Best Actress: Jessica Chastain, ZERO DARK THIRTY

Best Supporting Actor: Leonardo DiCaprio, DJANGO UNCHAINED

Best Supporting Actress: Ann Dowd, COMPLIANCE

Best Original Screenplay: Rian Johnson, LOOPER

Best Adapted Screenplay: David O. Russell, SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK

Best Animated Feature: WRECK-IT RALPH

Special Achievement in Filmmaking: Ben Affleck, ARGO

Breakthrough Actor: Tom Holland, THE IMPOSSIBLE
Breakthrough Actress: Quvenzhané Wallis, BEASTS OF THE SOUTHERN WILD

Best Directorial Debut: Benh Zeitlin, BEASTS OF THE SOUTHERN WILD

Best Foreign Language Film: AMOUR

Best Documentary: SEARCHING FOR SUGARMAN

William K. Everson Film History Award: 50 YEARS OF BOND FILMS

Best Ensemble: LES MISÉRABLES

Spotlight Award: John Goodman (ARGO, FLIGHT, PARANORMAN, TROUBLE WITH THE CURVE)

NBR Freedom of Expression Award: CENTRAL PARK FIVE

NBR Freedom of Expression Award: PROMISED LAND

Top Films
(in alphabetical order)

ARGO

BEASTS OF THE SOUTHERN WILD

DJANGO UNCHAINED

LES MISÉRABLES

LINCOLN

LOOPER

THE PERKS OF BEING A WALLFLOWER

PROMISED LAND

SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK

Top 5 Foreign Language Films

(In Alphabetical Order)

BARBARA

THE INTOUCHABLES

THE KID WITH A BIKE

NO

WAR WITCH

Top 5 Documentaries

(In Alphabetical Order)

AI WEIWEI: NEVER SORRY

DETROPIA

THE GATEKEEPERS

THE INVISIBLE WAR

ONLY THE YOUNG

Top 10 Independent Films

(In Alphabetical Order)

ARBITRAGE

BERNIE

COMPLIANCE

END OF WATCH

HELLO I MUST BE GOING

LITTLE BIRDS

MOONRISE KINGDOM

ON THE ROAD

QUARTET

SLEEPWALK WITH ME

Dave Brubeck passed away today. He was 91. The great jazz legend, a regular at Elaine’s whom I got to meet a few times, was most famous for his recording of “Take Five,” written by Paul Desmond. But he had hundreds of his own compositions, and was probably as influential as Miles Davis, John Coltrane or a half dozen other jazz pioneers. A lovely guy, a great life, and an amazing legacy. RIP

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=faJE92phKzI

Well, now, we’ve seen Quentin Tarantino’s “Django Unchained.” Technically, there’s a reviewing embargo until something like December 15th. So I can’t review it or tell you much about it except that it’s a kind of soul food spaghetti Western with a mad dash of Mel Brooks. Without getting into too much detail, though, it’s time to fit “Django” into the big Academy Award jigsaw puzzle. Today we’re going to have voting from the mostly irrelevant National Board of Review followed by the Los Angeles Film Critics. Other cities’ critics groups are going to start announcing their awards, followed by the Golden Globe nominations on the 13th. The Oscar nominations won’t be announced until January 10th. But everyone wants to know what to do, who goes into what category, etc.

So far the Best Picture category–10 choices– would be — in no particular order– Argo, Silver Linings Playbook. Lincoln, Zero Dark Thirty, Les Miserables, Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. The Master, and then choices among Amour, Rust & Bone, The Sessions, Beasts of the Southern Wild, Skyfall, and now Django. There’s no question that Django could be among the top 10. And Tarantino must be considered as Best Director. Whether you like his oeuvre or not, there’s a masterful and mature quality now to what he’s doing. Plus, his Q&A last night before several groups really demonstrated his overall brilliant comprehension of filmmaking. He’s somehow become more fascinating than ever. With Spielberg, Affleck Russell, Hooper and Bigelow, Paul Thomas Anderson ahead of him, Tarantino is not going to be out of the discussion.

The actors: I know there’s a push for Leonardo DiCaprio for Best Supporting Actor. This is not out of the question. DiCaprio is also full of surprises, and underrated too often. Go back and watch Blood Diamonds or J. Edgar or The Aviator. He is the rare combination of a movie star and an actor. As he gets older, he’s going to function more and more as a character actor, a la Jack Nicholson.

Jamie Foxx and Christoph Waltz are superb in “Django.” They function as a team as much as Joaquin Phoenix and Philip Seymour Hoffman in “The Master.” They have a special magic. I don’t know what to do with them. The lead actor category is very full already– Phoenix, Daniel Day Lewis, Denzel Washington, John Hawkes, Hugh Jackman. Who do you take out? Who do you put in? It’s a killer. Foxx’s character, as you’ll see in the film, has the biggest arc and grows the most. Waltz, however, is sparkling. When Tarantino found him, he must have thanked his lucky stars.

One thing’s for sure: there is great music in “Django.” I think their song nominee is “Who Did That to You?” by John Legend, written with Paul Epworth. That, plus “Suddenly” from “Les Miz” and the five songs listed on our front page poll, gives us at least seven terrific songs this season. A bumper crop, to be sure.

It was one of the most moving and heartfelt salutes I’ve been to ever: a memorial for the greatest press agent/publicist of them all, Lois Smith. After the event that was held last month in L.A. I didn’t think we could do better. But Leslee Dart put it together, and Rosie O’Donnell hosted it at the 92nd St. Y in a bright red jacket to toast our pal Lois, famous for the red coat and the red lipstick.

Meryl Streep spoke, Mandy Patinkin spoke, and sang from “Sunday in the Park with George”; Lois’s actress daughter Brooke and her publicist granddaughter Brianna (both chips off the old block) reminisced, fighting back tears; Peter Travers or Rolling Stone represented the press and did a great job, making me recall our good old days at the original Russian Tea Room. Robert Redford’s name was invoked a lot was Robert Altman’s.

Some of the stars who showed up included Bill Murray, Joel Coen and Frances McDormand, John Slattery and Talia Balsam, author Hannah Pakula (her late great husband Alan was Lois’s friend and client), and Terry McDonell. Everyone had a good laugh and a good cry. Rosie O’Donnell kept it moving and was very funny to distract the crowd with a running riff on Clare Danes in “Homeland” thanks to Mandy– who by the way wouldn’t tell anyone anything about the show. And Slattery refused to tell us anything about “Mad Men.”

What did we learn? That Lois called anyone “ducks” whose name she couldn’t remember. She was everyone’s Earth mother, she loved her family and she brought civility to a raucous world. And when the internet introduced chaos into the world of celebrity, she left.

“She had this idea that we could have personal lives,” Streep observed. And by the way, Meryl looked really stunning, very slim, and fashionable, just like a movie star. Then she stayed and gabbed with everyone, and had a nice long chat with McDormand during the small reception.

Lois, you were loved. I am so proud that I knew you and learned from you. Now you and Marilyn Monroe and Altman and Sidney Lumet and our old friend John Springer are having a great time, I know it.

Keep refreshing for more details….

Earl Shuman called me yesterday. Who is Earl Shuman? He wrote the lyrics to “Hey There Lonely Girl,” the classic hit from 1970 sung by Eddie Holman and still heard daily on oldies stations all over the world. Earl is 89 years old and very much alive and with it. He lives right here in Manhattan. And he’s unamused that Alicia Keys is singing two lines from the chorus of his song in the middle of “Girl on Fire,” her new hit. Don’t get him wrong: he likes “Girl on Fire.” He just wants to be paid for use of his song, along with the estate of his late collaborator Leon Carr.

Shuman is still writing music and very active. He’s working on a song right now with Michael Feinstein, in fact. But he’s best known for “Hey There Lonely Girl” plus, he said, many movie themes, and hit songs by the legendary Patti Page from the 1950s. He has 317 credits on the ASCAP data base. He liked the word ‘lonely.’ In 1953, one of his first big big hits was “Seven Lonely Days” by Georgia Gibbs, the Taylor Swift of her day. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RcNU2Dr5c5M

Shuman and Carr also wrote the 1964 off Broadway musical of “The Secret Life of Walter Mitty,” a little gem that should be revived.

Earl told me that this has happened before with “Hey There Lonely Girl.” Both Anita Baker and the Beastie Boys helped themselves to a portion of the song. In the end, they paid. “We worked it out, got credit,” he said. Why Alicia Keys, who helps herself to samples from the buffet of the musical canon often, didn’t just clear the rights to “Hey There Lonely Girl” instead of, uh, appropriating it, is anyone’s guess. But rest assured, Earl Shuman has a good lawyer, and he’s on the case.

Earlier story:

http://www.showbiz411.com/2012/11/25/alicia-keys-girl-on-fire-also-a-lonely-girl-from-1970

UPDATE: “Scandalous” will close on Sunday after all. Kathie Lee Gifford made a good effort, but the show was not good, and the audiences just weren’t there. See more below.

From Tuesday morning: The really not very good musical “Chaplin” has finally put up a closing notice for January 6th. How they made it this far is a mystery. “Scandalous” can’t be far behind. The Kathie Lee Gifford musical played at 37.6% capacity last week, taking in just over $370,000. Granted, the box office was up from prior weeks, but not remotely enough to keep going without tremendous problems.

I told you about the whole financial backing of “Scandalous” a couple of weeks ago: http://www.showbiz411.com/2012/11/20/scandalous-musical-backed-by-amway-family-and-christian-right-barely-holding-on. Then the New York Times, perhaps in an homage to this column, did the same thing. “Scandalous” is backed by money from the billionaire family that owns Christian right wing-pitched pyramid direct sales company Amway. Its other backer is the Foursquare Church founded by the musical’s subject, Aimee Semple McPherson.

There does seem to be a limited audience for “Scandalous,” which might have been better off pared down and playing in an off Broadway theater. At this rate een Amway reps won’t be able to keep it alive on the Great White Way. Expect a closing notice right after Christmas. A good try by Kathie Lee in the long run. And the Amway family, called Devos, won’t even miss the money. If only they’d included Milton Berle as a character. Now that would have been scandalous!

EXCLUSIVE by PAULA SCHWARTZ, special to Showbiz411– Sunday night Hugh Jackman sang Amanda Seyfried the sexiest, most luscious and gorgeous rendition of Happy Birthday imaginable and then he gave her a lap dance.

First, following a private screening of “Les Misérables” at a private soirée at Porter House in Manhattan, Jackman announced, “Tonight is a special night and I am going to sing one song.” Guests squealed and oohed and aahed and moved quickly to get as close to the Jean Valjean actor as possible without getting thrown out by security.

“It is the birthday of Amanda Seyfried. Amanda, come up here,” Jackman told his Les Miz co-star, who plays his adopted daughter Cossette. “Sit here Amanda,” Jackman said in sultry, silken tones, and half straddled her. “I once gave Barbara Walters a lap dance, and I promised her I would never do that again but seeing that she’s not here tonight,” Jackman purred, running his hand down Seyfriend’s dress. The piano chords began to play the familiar birthday song, and Jackman crooned, “She’s very innocent this girl…Amanda…Cossette…Yes it’s one of those father-daughter relationships,” he purred.

“Les Miz” co-stars Anne Hathaway, Russell Crowe, Eddie Redmayne, Samantha Barks, Sacha Baron Cohen, director Tom Hooper, producer Cameron Mackintosh and lyricist Alain Boublil hooted and cheered, along with celebrity guests who included Lorraine Bracco, Tony Danza, Michael Kors, Anna Wintour and Chelsea Clinton.

After being in the spotlight, Seyfried moved into a quiet corner of the room. After we wished her Happy Birthday, she said. “Well almost. It’s in 2 ½ hours.” She told me she was delighted and happy by Jackman’s serenade but not surprised. “He’s so generous nothing he does surprises me, but I really appreciate him singing one last song.”

It was nearly midnight when Jackman and Russell Crowe  (who has a buzz cut for “Winter’s Tale,” which he is shooting in New York) hugged and we overheard them make plans to meet and bring their guitars.

Tom Hooper — who’d been in Hollywood on Saturday night for the Academy Governor’s Ball– looked tired from non-stop promoting of “Les Miz,” which opens Christmas Day. (“The King’s Speech” also opened wide on Christmas Day two years ago.) I’ve already seen “Les Miz” twice I told him. “Seriously? Were you made to or did you do it by choice?” he asked seriously. As to what he hopes people will take from the musical, he said, he hopes they will “think about some of the bigger issues it talks about, the suffering around the world, but also close to their hearts, about parental love and personal transformation and redemption.”

More from the “Les Miz” party to follow…