You know what people say: first kid, you’re worried about them all the time. Second one, you ease up slightly. Third one? They’re on their own. And so it was last night at Vanity Fair’s jam-packed star-studded A list mega party at the Sunset Towers. Daniel Day Lewis set his third Oscar statue–a record, you kn0w–down on a pillow on a couch he stood in front of.

“Where is the Oscar?” I asked DDL. “He’s resting,” the newly minted Oscar winner said, pointing to the gold statue lying on a small silk couch pillow next to his wife Rebecca Miller. “He’s relaxing.”

DDL was doing anything but, his eyes welling up as each well wisher came to congratulate him from pal Robert DeNiro with wife Grace and son Elliott to fellow Oscar winner Christoph Waltz. And everyone wanted to talk to DDL, who is notoriously shy but was hugging anyone who came over last night. Three Oscars is just beyond any actor’s dream.

“Will you do theater next?” I asked Daniel.

“Maybe dinner theater!” he joked. He actually has nothing lined up yet. How do you follow “Lincoln”? Do you win an Oscar for every movie?

Meantime, just to the right, in the next conversation area, Harvey Weinstein was in deep, deep conversation with Judd Apatow and his “This is 40” actress wife Leslie Mann. A project in the future? Who knows? I do know that everyone was asking Harvey about getting Michelle Obama to present Best Picture–a coup, certainly, and one of the classiest moments in Oscar history.

Elsewhere, while the stars ate In-N-Out cheeseburgers, they also grouped and talked. Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta Jones settled in with Tim Burton and Helena Bonham Carter until Quentin Tarantino came and got Burton–whose arm is in a sling–into a big conversation about filmmaking, standing up, with Quentin swaying back and forth, and Tim –this was at 1am–looking he was going to collapse.

At one point the crowd in the main room swelled to a massive wall of people–very tricky to breathe or maneouver around. But oh that is Vanity Fair’s Oscar party. So I headed off to the adjacent room, through a bridge way, where “The Artist” star Jean DuJardin, last year’s Best Actor, was stuck. His English has really improved, so when I asked him if he’d been in touch with Uggie the Dog, DuJardin replied: “He has retired!”

Just over the bridge, there were little rabbit warrens of groups–the “Silver Linings” contingent consisted of David O. Russell, his wife, their various friends, and family, Bradley Cooper and his mother. Russell called out, with a big gesture, “We swept!”– then added, “the Spirit Awards!”

Around the corner was “Godfather” legendary director Francis Ford Coppola, who told me he’s finishing a script for a new movie. “Can’t talk about it yet,” he said. Then to the wood paneled bar in the darkly lit room, where Henry Cavill–soon to be Superman in “Man of Steel” — got into a conversation with Michele Rodriguez, who didn’t realize who Cavill was. Where’s she been? “In Southeast Asia.” Why? “To find my soul,” she replied.

Meantime Cavill. and let’s not cavil: next year he won’t be standing at the bar by himself. He’s a star-in-waiting, a leading man to be. How many women did he bed in “The Tudors” I asked him? “A lot,” he said. “Sounds like fun,” I offered. “It was hard work,” he said seriously.

British actors are very serious, although Henry did say he had fun working for Woody Allen in “To Rome with Love.” He will have to get used to people calling him Superman. But he’s very quick. I did ask whether in this version Lois Lane knows Superman is Clark Kent. And Cavill cavilled: “You’re not getting anything out of me!” he cried. Well played!

And there were so many others. Patricia Clarkson said: “I’ve been here since 4:30!” as she tried to escape the madding crowd around 1am. The party lasted til 2:45am at least. Some went on to Madonna’s “People Who Will Never Get an Oscar” party but most went home. Hugh Jackman, wife Deborra-Lee, “Les Miz” star Samantha Barks and her beautiful older sister Kim, Adrien Brody, Mark Ruffalo– Vanity Fair’s Oscar party is an endless parade. I called it the parade for Liberation Day. Oscar season is now over. Peggy Siegal can sleep. The 2014 campaigns won’t start until May. Yay!

Oscars. Ergo, Argo. Ben Affleck wasn’t best director but he won Best Picture. Jennifer Lawrence, Daniel Day Lewis, Christoph Waltz and Anne Hathaway all won acting awards. Ang Lee was Best director for Life of Pi. Everybody won something. The Oscar show was terrific, from top to bottom. All the musical numbers were excellent. Michelle Obama was a knockout surprise presenter.

This is how that happened: the Academy wanted Michelle Obama. Producers Craig Zadan and Neil Meron went to producer Harvey Weinstein for help. They all say it was Harvey’s daughter, Lily, who had the idea to do a live satellite hookup.

As it turned out the First Lady was busy entertaining 60 mayors this weekend at the White House so she couldn’t leave anyway.Zadan, Meron, Harvey and Lily, and Hawk Koch, the head of AMPAS, all flew to Washington a couple of weeks ago and nailed down a plan with Michelle Obama.

That they kept it a secret is pretty amazing. And that included making Jack Nicholson part of it.

Meantime, the Oscar show, I thought, was excellent. I haven’t been able to watch it on TV yet, but in person it was a knockout. Highlights included Jennifer Hudson’s amazing delivery of her “Dreamgirls” song, Shirley Bassey old schooling it on “Goldfinger,” and Adele having Sony supply a special orchestra and singers for “Skyfall.” Barbra Streisand brought the audience to its feet with “The Way We Were.” Norah Jones was absolutely lovely.

At the swanky Governor’s Ball, Streisand and Adele finally met, and hit it off like a house on fire.

Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban skipped the Ball because Nicole starts shooting a new film with Colin Firth in the UK on Tuesday. I was so delighted to see them–they are really a happy, warm couple.

Offstage: Sally Field came swooping down to the little bar off the stage right after she lost Best Supporting Actress to Anne Hathaway. “I need a bathroom and a glass of wine!” she declared. Both were conjured up for her right away. Sally is a lot of fun, and — with two Oscars– was philosophical about losing.

Who hung out in the bar for some time? Why, Rupert Murdoch. He was chatting up producers and financiers including Ryan Kavanagh of Relativity.

Not too long into the show, Mark Wahlberg turned up in the Dolby bar wearing street clothes– a long sleeved t shirt, jeans, and sneakers. Did he not get the memo about black tie? Mark laughed. “I thought I’d change here. Impossible at home with kids, etc. ”

Keep refreshing…

Twas the night before Oscars and all through the town, everyone was stirring and no one was down. Indeed, Hollywood seemed ebullient on Saturday night as limos careened back and forth up and down Sunset Blvd. from the Chateau Marmont to Soho House and up to the Beverly Hills Hotel carrying actors, actresses, and celebrities. Meanwhile, at the Dolby Theater, in rehearsal, you could hear the cast of “Les Miserables” and a 48 person strong chorus belting out show tunes, and Dame Shirley Bassey polishing up her “Goldfinger” for the big event.

At Madeo’s on Beverly Boulevard, Charles Finch held his annual pre Oscar dinner, sponsored by Chanel, and featuring Oscar nominee Jessica Chastain. Finch, the British impresario, is also the son of late great actor Peter Finch, and he knows a thing or two about theater. The result is that his parties are like little presentations, cozily lit, super-salons.

And who did we see? Rebecca Gayheart and Eric Dane, Ioann Grufudd and Alice Ryan, producer Ed Pressman and wife Annie with producer Laura Bickford, Jared Harris and producer Cassian Elwes and so on, sprinkled in among fashionistas. Livia Firth, Colin’s wife, explained her Oscar winning husband was abroad shooting his second film in a row with Nicole Kidman. Cool.

And all through the low ceilinged room of Madeo’s you could hear the word “Argo” burbling along. Chastain, a pragmatist, told me: “I’m not going to win, and it’s fine.” She and her Italian boyfriend — Gian Luca Passi de Preposulo– are headed to Milan next week for a break before Jessica begins work on her next film. Between “Zero Dark Thirty” and “The Heiress” on Broadway, Chastain has had an extraordinary run this year.

Some other guests included writer Brett Easton Ellis, and married actors Alessandro Nivola and Emily Mortimer.

Meantime, back at the newly refreshed and just reopened Polo Lounge, Warren Beatty caused a stir when he walked in– and headed straight over to a table hosted by producer Brian Grazer. Soon it was clear that Ron Burkle and Steve Bing were also there, and some attractive young ladies filled in the extra seats. But the Polo was buzzing. Brett Ratner arrived in a wool cap.

“Dark Knight” director Christopher Nolan had the table for eight right next to the Beatty-Bing-Grazer, while Alanna Stewart got her own table., Phillippe Dauman, the man who runs Viacom, was fully ensonced in a banquette. And the in house pianist played the theme from “Downton Abbey.”

Everyone loves the Polo Lounge, but here’s some advice. Don’t go there unless money is no object. Our waiter said he’d bring my friend a “very good glass of red wine.” Hell0–the one was glass of red wine was $65. Yes, sixty five dollars.

Why was everyone eating in the Polo? At the same time, the notorious “Night Before” party was going in the hotel at $5,000 a ticket. “There’s no food in there,” one guest told me of the star studded event that benefits the Motion Picture Home in Woodland Hills. This year’s gift bag: a small picnic basket in a vinyl container. Ah, for the pre-recession days of iPods, Flip cameras, and custom made sneakers.

So we skedaddled over to Soho House where Harvey Weinstein had good reason to celebrate: Silver Linings Playbook was named Best Feature at the Indie Spirit awards. So Piers Morgan, Christoph Waltz, Leonardo DiCaprio, Quentin Tarantino, Jamie Foxx, Pauly Herman, Dermot Mulroney, director John Wells, and actor-rapper Common, Suzanne dePasse, Star Jones, Norah Lawlor, and so on kept the garden room high above Sunset Blvd. humming for some time after midnight.

Joaquin Phoenix, looking spiffy, put in an appearance “Are you going to be at the show?” I asked him. Joaquin was amused. “People keep asking me that,” said the star of The Master, “I didn’t know I had a choice.”

This is what I learned about Season Four of “Downton Abbey” from director Simon Curtis, who’s married in real life to Lady Cora, aka Elizabeth McGovern: absolutely nothing. Simon, whose credits include last year’s hit, “My Week With Marilyn,” is in town polishing up details of his next film, “The Chaperone.” Simon says: “I never read the scripts and I don’t ask what’s going on. It’s much easier that way.” He did say the show is three days into production on Season Four, which is why McGovern couldn’t join him on this trip.

Curtis was just one of dozens of showbiz Brits who showed up for the annual soiree at the home of the very charming British Consul General Barbara Hay. This is always a swell Oscar week event. It’s so popular that New York character Radio Man, who hangs out at the front  of red carpets, rode his bike all the way from his Santa Monica motel just to get the gift bag!

“Les Miserables” director Tom Hooper brought his parents, who just arrived from London.

And here’s a clue about Sunday’s “James Bond” anniversary tribute: George Lazenby, onetime 007 from “On Her Majesty’s Secret Service,” was present and enjoying PIMM’s special Bond martinis. He may be the only Bond in the Dolby Theater tomorrow.

Also: I ran into Jared Harris, so good in “Lincoln.” We’re still smarting from his suicide on “Mad Men” last season. Lane Pryce was a great character! But Jared is very very busy with lots of films shot and more to come.

Plus: “Les Miz” producer Cameron Mackintosh, beaming, going back and forth from Oscar rehearsals, excited about his cast performing what should be a show-stopping medley on the show Sunday. Also from “Les Miz”: the Oscar nominated costume designer and production designer.

And lots and lots of PIMMs. That’s heavy on the Mmmmmm’s.