“Happy Gilmore” was one of those off beat silly Adam Sandler movies that spoke its own language, that of a manchild.
Most Sander movies, all the comedies produced by him, are like that. A couple — “The Wedding Singer” comes to mind — try to rise above their limitations.
It’s tough dealing with Sandler because sometimes he appears in a great movie like “The Meyerowitz Stories” or “Uncut Gems,” and you think, this is what he’s really like, forget that other stuff. But the latter is his bread and butter.
Now, served like a cold stale sandwich, comes “Happy Gilmore 2.” It’s 29 years since the original. Sandler now releases his comedies on Netflix, which doesn’t give viewing numbers and no box office reports exist. He can just churn out garbage, and not worry what anyone has to say.
“Happy Gilmore 2” comes in a Glad tie bag ready for curb delivery. It’s not a movie, but a placeholder time suck you could watch hungover between bouts of vomiting. It’s that bad.
We get the message of the cynicism in the first five minutes. Happy, now a wildly successful, wealthy golfer, hits a long drive that lodges in his wife’s forehead and kills her. Bad bing. That’s it. She’s dead, and no one cares. Let’s move on. (The wife is played again, this time by Julie Bowen, who’s had every delicious line in her face erased.)
With the wife dead, Happy goes on a bender and loses all his money, his house, and his career. He drinks like crazy. His sons are an unpleasant group of thugs. His daughter, played by Sandler’s real life daughter, is present, showing off the millions Sandler spent on her ballet lessons. (Sandler’s wife is a minor character in the movie, too.)
Characters from the original movie come and go with cameos including the least funny person in the world, Rob Schneider. (Rob’s son also has a role in this nepo baby extravaganza.)
The guest star list is longer than the “Fantastic Four” credits for digital graphic design. A slew of famous golfers wander in and out. Sandler’s mother has a part! All of it adds up to nothing pretty fast. Sandler even throws in Bad Bunny, and “Jeopardy!” host Ken Jennings.
“Happy Gilmore 2” is easy to watch because Netflix has fast forward. Once Bowen’s Virginia gets “balled,” you can start moving the cursor along, dipping in for curiosity, and maybe checking your email at the same time.
How would “Happy Gilmore” have done in theaters? You tell me. It as a 67% among critics on Rotten Tomatoes. Thee are only 45 reviews. Most are from bloggers, not top critics. The Audience Meter is just 75%.
