Everyone’s favorite couple, John Legend and Chrissie Teigen, are on the cover of Good Housekeeping, Parade, Family Cirlce with their children– whoops, no that’s Vanity Fair. Yes, Vanity Fair. Okay, it’s not like the Vanity Fair of old. But we love John and Chrissie, and the story is cute and they announce their choice of presidential candidate. (It’s Elizabeth Warren.)
They each have lots of projects. John has a Christmas album coming out with a new version of “Baby It’s Cold Outside,” made famous originally by Dean Martin. But now that song is considered predatory (please) so he’s changed the lyrics and added Kelly Clarkson. I don’t know what the estate of the great Frank Loesser, who wrote the song in 1944, feels about this.
The new version reads:
“I really can’t stay (BABY IT’S COLD OUTSIDE)
I’ve gotta go away (I CAN CALL YOU A RIDE.)
This evening has been (SO GLAD THAT YOU DROPPED IN)
So very nice (TIME SPENT WITH YOU IS PARADISE)
My mother will start to worry (I’LL CALL A CAR AND TELL ‘EM TO HURRY)”
The original dangerous lyrics:
I gotta go away (Baby it’s cold outside)
This evening has been (Been hoping that you’d dropped in)
So very nice (I’ll hold your hands they’re just like ice)
My mother will start to worry (Beautiful what’s your hurry?)
My father will be pacing the floor (Listen to the fireplace roar)
So really I’d better scurry (Beautiful please don’t hurry)
Well maybe just a half a drink more (I’ll put some records on while I pour)
Say what’s in this drink? (No cabs to be had out there)
I wish I knew how (Your eyes are like starlight now)
To break this spell (I’ll take your hat, your hair looks swell) (Why thank you)
I ought to say no, no, no sir (Mind if move in closer?)
At least I’m gonna say that I tried (What’s the sense of hurtin’ my pride?)
I really can’t stay (Baby don’t hold out)
Baby it’s cold outside
I like to think of it as opportunistic
The answer is no (But baby it’s cold outside)
The welcome has been (How lucky that you dropped in)
So nice and warm (Look out the window at that storm)
My sister will be suspicious (Gosh your lips look delicious!)
My brother will be there at the door (Waves upon a tropical shore)
My maiden aunt’s mind is vicious (Gosh your lips are delicious!)
Well maybe just a cigarette more (Never such a blizzard before) (And I don’t even smoke)
Say lend me a coat? (It’s up to your knees out there!)
You’ve really been grand, (I feel when I touch your hand)
But don’t you see? (How can you do this thing to me?)
There’s bound to be talk tomorrow (Think of my life long sorrow!)
At least there will be plenty implied (If you caught pneumonia and died!)
I really can’t stay (Get over that old out)
Baby it’s cold
Baby it’s cold outside
Okay fine, just another drink then
That took a lot of convincing!
