Friday, June 21, 2024

Lindsay Lohan Brother Arrested: Four of Six Lohans Have Now Been Arrested And or Jailed


Lindsay Lohan’s brother Michael Lohan Jr. was arrested today in New York. He forged a placard for his windshield pretending he was a New York State staffer from the executive branch. This was so he wouldn’t have to pay at a parking meter. Cops nailed him.

Michael Jr. now becomes the fourth Lohan to be arrested by the police. Lindsay, of course, has a famous record. Her mom, Dina, was caught driving drunk. Father Michael? He spent three years in jail and five on probation after being convicted for criminal contempt during an insider trading investigation. Then he spent another year in jail for jumping bail. He’s had several other brushes with the law involving incarceration.

The prison obsession isn’t confined just to the main family. Michael’s second wife, Kate, has also been cuffed by the police during a domestic dispute with Michael. And Dina’s brother Paul spent a year in jail for fraud concerning a fake 9/11 loss claim.

I may have missed one or two episodes, but you get the idea. The Lohans are a “Law and Order” episode that writes itself. It has to be genetic on both sides. Maybe a top psychiatric team can figure it out. For Long Island, Joey Buttafuoco and Amy Fisher were always the standard bearers. But they have nothing on the Lohans!

There are still two Lohans untouched by the police: Lindsay’s brother Cody and sister Ali. But the odds aren’t good for them. Maybe they should surrender now. Or get a family punch card, so on the sixth arrest someone gets out without bail.

They should really rent David Michod’s “Animal Kingdom” for fun one night.

Roger Friedman
Roger Friedman
Roger Friedman began his Showbiz411 column in April 2009 after 10 years with Fox News, where he created the Fox411 column. His movie reviews are carried by Rotten Tomatoes, and he is a member of both the movie and TV branches of the Critics Choice Awards. His articles have appeared in dozens of publications over the years including New York Magazine, where he wrote the Intelligencer column in the mid 90s and covered the OJ Simpson trial, and Fox News (when it wasn't so crazy) where he covered Michael Jackson. He is also the writer and co-producer of "Only the Strong Survive," a selection of the Cannes, Sundance, and Telluride Film festivals, directed by DA Pennebaker and Chris Hegedus.

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