Thursday, May 23, 2024

Kimberly Guilfoyle, Failed Newscaster, Paid Trump Staffer, Explodes on Stage During First Night of 2020 Republic Convention


Kimberly Guilfoyle is Donald Trump Jr’s lady friend. She’s also a failed newscaster who’s reportedly paid $180,000 by the Trump campaign. Last night she exploded on stage during the Republican convention. She stopped short of singing “Don’t Cry for Me, Argentina,” but she came damn close. Perhaps imitating Judge Jeanine “Box Wine” Pirro, Kim didn’t realize there were NO PEOPLE In the auditorium as she shouted out her speech endorsing the man she prays will be her father in law one day. How did she prepare for this performance? Was it a case of Red Bull? Or was it something more? I’m told she had to be scraped off the ceiling later and reassembled at a Scientology retreat.

Here now, hear now, Kimberly Guilfoyle. And after, I’ve given you Donald Trump Jr.’s red-eyed remarks, also shall we say caffeinated beyond normal levels:

PS Some say that Jerry Falwell, Jr went home with these two last night and watched them have fully clothed relations for ten seconds before passing out. Luckily, Falwell was there to call the ambulance.

Roger Friedman
Roger Friedman
Roger Friedman began his Showbiz411 column in April 2009 after 10 years with Fox News, where he created the Fox411 column. His movie reviews are carried by Rotten Tomatoes, and he is a member of both the movie and TV branches of the Critics Choice Awards. His articles have appeared in dozens of publications over the years including New York Magazine, where he wrote the Intelligencer column in the mid 90s and covered the OJ Simpson trial, and Fox News (when it wasn't so crazy) where he covered Michael Jackson. He is also the writer and co-producer of "Only the Strong Survive," a selection of the Cannes, Sundance, and Telluride Film festivals, directed by DA Pennebaker and Chris Hegedus.

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