Charlie Sheen is fast becoming like a character from a Kurt Vonnegut novel. He is nothing, sheer dross, and people are following him. He’s L. Ron Hubbard and Kilgore Trout rolled into one. Sheen joined Twitter, sent out a scarce 19 messages–mostly pictures–and now has over 1 million people signed in is Twitter account. Sheen has nothing to say of any value, yet he mustered that much attention thanks to his four day media barrage. One person who has a lot of say, on the other hand, is his live in porn star girlfriend, Bree Olson. No, I cannot reprint or re-tweet almost anything she has addressed in her truly vulgar, porno prose. I hope Brooke Mueller‘s lawyer is printing out Olson’s bon mots, and reads them into the record during Sheen’s next custody hearing. A good influence on two year olds? Hmmmm….Maybe only in Hefner’s grotto. Anyway. Who is Charlie following on Twitter? Just 23 people including Brett Ratner, P Diddy, Sarah Silverman, Sly Stallone. Nicky Hilton, George Lopez, Piers Morgan, Alyssa Milano, Fred Durst, Minka Kelly, Howard Stern, Will Arnett, and Yankee slugger Nick Swisher. If we could just figure out what this eclectic group has in common, maybe we could unlock the key to Charlie’s madness. Oh wait: he also follows Bree, who says on Twitter that she is going home to Indiana soon, thought her computer guy was cute, and wants to be sodomized. Please.