Home Movies Oscars: No Gold Statues on the Red Carpet This Year, as Selfie...

No one is accusing the huge gold Oscar statues that dot the Academy Awards red carpet of anything. I want to make it clear.

There were whispers that the Times– L.A., NY, one of those papers– was working on something. No one knows.

But for the first time in recent memory the Oscar red carpet will not have gold statues placed on the red carpet or anywhere in sight.

It’s not like they were offensive– the statues are anatomically indifferent. They’re not CIS, or trans or anything else. ‘It’ is their pronoun. And ‘them.’

But the word has gone out that news crews will not have to report on the painting of the statues this year. They are in repose. Guests will be disappointed. The gold statues were the subject of many selfies. But again, there are said to be anecdotes of the statues getting too frisky. Some of them are said to have “warmed up” during photo ops that got too close. But that might have been a heater in the lighting above!

A source said, “They might possibly have some inside the theater but right now there aren’t any plans to have them anywhere else. The only thing I can think is either they are staging a silent protest or have all made plans to hang out on Hollywood Blvd with the tourists.”

Either way, the boys are gone. And the red carpet will be a much safer place!

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