Best laugh of the weekend: a Brit tabloid’s assertion that Macaulay Culkin is the biological father of Blanket, Michael Jackson’s youngest child.

Are they kidding? This is as preposterous as Mark Lester being Paris’s father.

In each case, there isn’t even a slight hint of physical similarity. Forget that Culkin is blond and blue eyed, and that Blanket is dark and possibly Latino.

It makes no difference to the British press!

We can only imagine the laugh Culkin, who lives in New York’s West Village with his girlfriend, must have gotten.

Who’s next to be revealed as a bio parent of a Jackson child? Eggs from Tatum O’Neal? Sperm from Bubbles the Chimp?

As I’ve reported since 2005, Blanket is the product of Michael Jackson’s biological matter and a surrogate mother. The surrogate was chosen from a catalogue of names presented to Jackson by none other than Dr. Arnold Klein. Neither Dr. Klein, Mark Lester, Macaulay Culkin, nor Topo Gigio is the father.

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